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Showing posts from May, 2012

Top Ten Things I Expect

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1. If I have an appointment with a doctor, I expect to, at some point, however brief or fleeting, see an actual doctor. 2. If I have been sent all over creation doing expensive and invasive tests, I expect that a doctor will review them with me at the appointment for which I have cleared my schedule, traveled, finagled and paid for. 3. I expect that if a physician is not available to see me, I will be informed, and have the opportunity to cancel the appointment, and that my insurance will not be billed as though I did see a physician. 4. I expect to see a physician whose name bears some resemblance to the name I submitted to my insurance company and primary care physician. A close resemblance would be preferred. This would help me help you keep up the facade that you are actually seeing all of the patients that the insurance companies (and I) are billed for. 5. If I am asked to do any invasive tests, I ask that they are thoroughly and accurately prepared, and that I am not

Cystic Gal: Cliff, Put Down That Hoagie!

Tonight I came upon this old blog o' mine and realized- the problem i have right now is NO DIFFERENT than the one I had before transplant. And it gives a shout out to Dr. U... so, enjoy! xo, cg Cystic Gal: Cliff, Put Down That Hoagie! : You might be wondering, right about now - What does CG have to do with HH (Dr. Heathcliff Huxtible)? Well, I'll tell you. "Cliff," as we all...

Random Blathering (not really about CF or transplant or really anything)

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My sister's favorite posts are the ones when I write a bunch of random stuff that comes to mind and so for sister, I say, here you are: My high school English teacher posted a poem today by Charles Bukowski that brought back a lot of memories for me of old friends and old times and mostly of learning to write in a stream of consciousness in my high school English class, maybe because I hadn't written like that before, or maybe because I didn't know that's what it was or what I ought to be calling it.  I remember that Kathy always wrote much more metered work than I did, and she still does, and I still don't  . . . know how I feel about that. Here is the poem that Mrs. A posted:   Hemingway Never Did This by Charles Bukowski I read that he lost a suitcase full of manuscripts on a train and that they never were recovered. I can't match the agony of this but the other night I wrote a 3-page poem upon this computer and through my lack of diligence and practice

My Top Ten Causes of Stress

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Scary pictures of birds stress me out.  My last post made me think about things in my day that acutely stress me out. Here is my list from today. In other news, I spent the weekend with my bff and came to many realizations about my stress and anxiety level that have already made my dealing with stress better, as I try to make some concrete decisions about what I can control in life to lessen my anxiety. Oh yeah, here's the list: Top Ten Stresses for Me, Myself and more Me.  1. Waking up late. 2. People being loud for no good reason. Literally, I don't mind loud laughter or loud talking. I can't stand yelling, slamming, or generally loudness with negative motivation. 3. People swearing for no good reason. See above. 4. Not being able to sleep when I'm supposed to be sleeping, but being sleepy when I'm not supposed to be sleeping. 5. People calling my on the phone who I don't know to talk about something I don't care about. 6. My ho

Top Ten Causes of Stress

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These crazy pool noodle women came up when I searched for the title of this blog.  So.... #1 cause of stress: multi-generational noodle-based water aerobics?  This list of TOP TEN CAUSES OF STRESS is from a random internet place, but I found similar lists all over so I'm not going to cite it. Here is what I think about stress: I need to reduce mine but I am not sure what is causing it because it seems that everything is causing it. So, here is a top ten list and I'm going to comment on each item as an exercise in trying to figure out my personal stresses. My thoughts are in purple.  1. Self-criticism.   Tame your inner critic (that’s the part of you that shakes a finger at you). Focus on your strengths and forgive yourself. I don't think I have this or do this. I am not very critical of myself, but I would say that I am overly critical of the world around me which is probably more like #9 below.  2. Powerlessness.  Don’t believe you have no options. Open you

Stress and Anxiety: an elusive duo

I tried just now to write a coherent post about how my stress and anxiety level are so high right now, and I am having trouble controlling them. But that's all I really have to say about that. Goodnight.

Poem Drafts-o Post-o, more Iron and Wine

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Ryan Kelly reminds me that Sam Beam is "both 'The Iron' and 'The Wine.'" I found another poem that seems to have preceded the draft I posted of "My Body Remembers" a few weeks ago. It seems I wrote a lot of poetry in the year 2010 that I do not remember at all now. I can only assume that I wrote most of it while on drugs (legal drugs) but who's to say? I remember nothing. This poem I found, I will not publish because it is even too personal for this blog (I think I can hear my bff gasping across the city, "It cannot be true!"). I will copy the repetition for you: but i'm not dead or dying, i'm a living breathing person with miles left to swim I think it's a pretty good poem, and if I have some more energy another night, perhaps I'll edit out the scandalous bits and then put it on here for you. Although, it will only be half as interesting after that. ;) I think it's interesting that I cou

What is wrong with this picture?

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I burst a tiny blood vessel in my eye. The school nurse says, "It was probably the sneezing." Sigh. I am afraid of Visine, Claymation, and puppets that look human but aren't. My cat is meowing in a high pitched kitten voice which makes me think she is getting more Deaf. The kid from the Beastie Boys died and that is oddly sad for me and I can't tell you why because of privacy. Eli Manning is really annoying on SNL. I saw Guys and Dolls tonight. I freaking love Guys and Dolls. What's in the dailiy news? I'll tell you what's in the dailiy news. Rhianna cannot sing. Either can I (lately) And I cannot wait for summer. This is all the news that fit to print. More substantial post to follow.... cg @bethpeters on the tweeters.