This Weekend Rocked My Socks

Top Ten Reasons The Weekend Rocked My Socks
in no particular order.

1. Surprise visit from one of my best buddies in the whole wide world!

2. Re-watching a wonderful though dark dark movie, followed by great discussion.

3. "Bethenny Getting Married" is the best show on t.v. I made my male buddy watch this show and was hoping for a funnier sample episode, as though it was physically possible to get him watching this show of his own free will. Ah well, it wasn't funny, but he endured THE wedding episode and I thoroughly enjoyed it. He, at the very minimum, pretended to enjoy it, and this was satisfactory for all parties. Side note: I had to watch that Lebron James shit-show DECISION and nearly cried over those poor kids at the Boys and Girls Club who were totally played out by that a-hole on live tv. Who keeps kids out on a weeknight to tell them bad news and make them cry? Poor, poor taste. And Lebron, you're not all that. I didn't even know you're name before this weekend. Bethenny Frankel would never have pulled a stunt so cruel. 2 points for Bethenny. I hope those kids cried or said mean things to "the King" for his a-holiness.

Back to the list . . . of Top Ten Reasons This Weekend Rocked My Socks . . .

4. Thai. Food. With. Leftovers.

5. Peapod delivery prior to my pal's arrival provided the peace that only a full fridge of pudding cups, avocados, cheese and cheese-related products, and an entire corner of my kitchen I call "the beverage center" full of all sorts of hydration for my salty bod- made for a wonderful tumyurful time.

6. Have I yet mentioned NY Deli Pizza in my neighborhood that is so very very very college-style cheap, and yet so very very very Boston-style yummy Italian food? 'nuf said.

7. Houseguests + Open Refusal to actually cook for them = Sweet Relief.

8. Helped work on the draft of play that woke up my director brain and my playwright brain.

9. Took some advice from CFFatBoy and explored a new webhosting service, and now think about moving my "real" yet unlaunched website over to it! Oh yeah, and got my second official web client!

10. Seeing the people you love : Best ever.

11. BONUS: Managed to do all my meds, take my bipap naps, and get plenty of sleepy time sleep.

Oh no wait. One day, I forgot my bipap nap but that was because of the uninteresting transplant appointment I had to attend all afternoon, and also forgot, on the same day, to drink my afternoon cup of coffee- HEADACHE CITY. Thank goodness for my bipap. To bed for me! Both then, and now!

12. DOUBLE BONUS SHOUT-OUT: Extra doting by B-Kitty who has taken a new dislike to visitors. GTFO, she meowed. She spent today reclaiming all "infected" furniture and generally meowing in my face. Oh wait, the second part of that is not really news.

13. NEWSINESS: My shirts arrived!!!! Or shall I say, YOUR shirts arrived! The luck keeps coming. Every day, a lucky thing so far.

g'night! party hard. sleep it off.
cg

Tonight, I am too tired to tell you about STEP 4

This is an old picture (2007?), but an accurate facial expression of how I feel about seein' my buddies!
Actually, I was on the way to teach a class called "non dance movement for the ballet student."
I love tellin' people about that crazy class.
Boy, I love my line of work.

I digress . . .

STEP FOUR! in the Get Back to Yourself Plan of 2010:

"Socialize your ass off."

Okay not really.
I had a very busy weekend which included, having friends for dinner Thursday night at my house (and I cooked:) for H-Mama, J-Baby and J-Prof
Friend over for a drink of wine on the porch on Friday (T-Money)
Dinner "date" on Saturday. (C-Dad)
Trip across town to see H-Mama and J-Prof tonight.

One social thing per day. And I'm tired!

But, I had a lot of fun this weekend, and boy did I need it!

In planning next weekend, I wrote this in an email to my friend K-?? some pseudonym I cannot recall:

"ok last thing then really to bed,
i think it's hilarious that now 2 events in one weekend = "socializing my ass off." can one "socialize" (a rather regal term) one's "ass off?" (how low brow!) My life is such a comic disaster right now. Why can't this be a sit com and not a potential tragedy?

GOODNIGHT!"

and thus, Goodnight!
cg

Video about Shirts and Bras and Packing

So I look a little silly in this video, as I have a strapless shirt on. But I assure you, I do have a shirt on!!

Top Ten Things That Don't Completely Suck About the Hospital

Here I am in New England and in the big house again. I'm taking a break from my usual wry sensibility of you-know-what-blows humor, and taking a page out of Ronnie's book to write about ten things that I am actually thankful for when I'm in the unnamed hospital here.

Top Ten Things That Don't Completely Suck About the Hospital

1. Stocking up on free prescriptions. Ignoring the fact that I pay out the ass for my so-called "Cadillac plan" of health care, I enjoy the fact that infection control protocol at my hospital provides me with a shiny new inhaler every day.

2. Some cable stations I do not have at home.

3. In so much as I can navigate the menu, and ignoring item listed in #1, free eats, especially widely available desserts.

4. Respiratory therapists I really like!

5. Unfettered access to Law n Order episodes 24/7, without the shaming eyes of other humans seeing how many hours I can enjoy as background entertainment.

6. Free, though cheap, stethoscope (see item #1 for further social commentary)

7. Endless supply of super friends and loved ones that come-a-callin'.

8. Easily slipping into the "I'm on a spa retreat!" subtext as I enjoy doing my nails, writing many poems, and catching up on my correspondence.

9. Much time for online obsessions of late: vistaprint.com for Patient Press, and overstock.com for much-needed, though too-cheap-to-buy-outright, items such as bipap-friendly pillows and matching springtime bedding, new (pretty, 100% mold and old germ free) shower curtain for after transplant, seasonal purse (I allow myself to buy one purse a year. I believe this is a money saving rule in comparison with my female friends and moreover, foes), new watch as I developed allergy to cheap metal base of my former 4-year-long watch. (p.s. tell me again why my blog does not enjoy endorsement dollars?)

10. Research for future writing projects: Priceless.

Awesome Day Today

Today I went to Red Spot Printing and though the fumes of the old printin' press were a little hard to muster before we moved into the glass office, I had a rad time picking out the pretty papers and binding and doodley dads for me book!

Then, I took my car to the awesome Tom Lyons Tires (and other automotive razzmatazz), because oh nos! I thought somethin' was wrong-o with my car-o. It was making a clunketty clunk noise when switching gears yesterday. Nothin' wrong-o, says Mr. Tom-o. (err... they looked, and saw nothing, drove it around, and say, it's okay now!)- best part: No charge. Thanks Tom Lyons!!

Then I came home and received a crazy sleep outfit from my sister which I did uploadeodoe.

Then I emailed my ars off with an author named Patrick Randolph about a book called EMPTY SHOES. This Patrick and I wanna have our poetry reading together. His book- about homelessness. Me book (and why am I Irish today), about waiting on The List- what do they have in common?

Navigating complex social systems while enduring the most challenging emotional experience of your life. Should make for a great night! Err... at least a lot to think about!!

Super. Gotta go write a poem about...oh dang, I'm not gonna tell you.

Best Day EveRRRRR

P.S. Pre-Script: Remember, it's not too late to order CysticGal's limited edition chapbook, "Unto the East," by clicking HERE.

Onward . . .

Today, my mom and I got up relatively early and got out of the house by 11:00! This is a harrowing (heroing? eh?) journey not often achieved by choice around here.

We went to the gym where she worked out and I did my weights routine and put some of the lazy gym-goers to shamitty shame. I think the gym should pay me to go the gym, do my work outs, and let people look at me and think, "Wow that's a good workout, and she's got the oxygen. I should really get going on this workout thing."

THEN, I ate a yummitty yum sandwich and berry smoooooothy, and checked the sales of my book while still at the fancy guest-pass-tastic gym. Discovery: I've already sold 108 books. So super.

THEN, I got a French manicure that put the self-applied ones I did in high school to a high degree of shame. This manicure only cost me $10! Awesome.

THEN, I came home and took a nap! A two-cat nap at that.

THEN, my mom and I went out for a yum yum yummy but affordable dinner! Steak and potatoes, man. Serious yum.

NOW, we're gonna get ready for bed early and watch the last bit of DAMAGES Season 1, while she drinks a "spritzah" and I drink hot apple cider. AND we'll have girl scout cookies.

THEN, we're going to bed early because we might go back to the aforementioned guest-pass-tastic fancy gym tomorrow!

3 month Guest Pass at Fancy Gym: $24- TOTAL!
Sandwich and Smoothy: $7
French Manicure: $10
Steak Din Din: not too expensive either.
Damages Rental: Netflix Trial Membership
Girl Scout Cookies: Still $3 a box.

Being a Recessionista: PRICELESS.

Be cheap. Live Large. The Economy Blows.

L'Chaim!

Goodnight!

daily daily cha cha cha

I'm going to try to get back into the habit of daily posts even if I think that I don't have a lot to say and even though my energy level is poo poo pooey lately. I had a great thanksgiving and even enjoyed a tiny day of beauty with my mom on saturday. We got manicures and went for pizza and bought a sweater for my cat B-Kitty who is always Cold because she is Old.

I wonder if I haven't been doing as many free flowing posts because now I know that a lot more people that I actually KNOW in real life are reading my blog. I had 600 unique readers last week and 200 of them were NEW. Holy pajoly, that's a whole lot of new readers. But then again if they're here reading it means they want to know what I'm thinking even if I'm thinking random thoughts.

I'm getting more and more ready for the tx everyday. I've been practicing the relaxation rituals and plug in my ipod every night so I can bring my songs with me to the hospital. I'm getting sick of waiting and wonder how many other people are there in the region with my same height and weight and state of illness. What if there are a lot? I don't think there could be a lot.

My family is settling in on all their plans to come here for Christmas and I am so very excited to host them. I also wonder, will I have my new lungs by then? I've been having lots of visitors over here- well not a lot of different people but a steady stream of the close close people and that is ENOUGH. My muzzy and I are getting along so very well. What else to write about? I don't know.

I'm getting a mssage today. One thing the BiPap does that I can't seem to get around is that it makes my neck hurt because the straps go around my head and neck and if they are loose the mask moves too much and annoys me but if they are tight they tend to pull on my neck overnigth and pooooo it hurts.

Oh well I must get a massage. Life is so hard.

:)

Tonight perhaps a real stream of consciousness post and tomorrow perhaps a poem to please K-Poet. Or did she have another pseudonym?

I can't recall . . .

Health Update and Fun for BiPap Use

Weird Greek Model Style Porcelain Man Wearing A BiPap Mask.
Perhaps he has CF and high CO2

So things were sorta complicated this week, as I had two good sessions at Physical Therapy and was doing a good job of home exercise and meds and all that, as well.

Now, remember that when I was in the hospital in October, I ended up in the hospital because of hypercapnia, or high carbon dioxide levels, that were causing me to have severe headaches, delusional and illogical thinking, and a desire to sleep all the time (which compounded the problem). Eventually, this caused acute respiratory failure and I had to spend 5 days in the ICU reducing my CO2 levels using a BiPap machine, or assisted ventilation, to help me breathe more deeply and also clear my "used" air completely so that my CO2 levels would lower. I have continued to use the BiPap machine at home.

Okay- so then this Thursday, at Physical Therapy, I started to get the CO2 headache during exercise. The headache is a very specific, sudden, painful kind of headache that usually wakes patients up from sleep (like it did with me). It was striking me during exercise, which is odd. I went to the doctor that day, and my CO2 level had raised in one week from 63 to 86- not good, and most likely responsible for my headache. So oh no!

To see if this was a fluke, Dr U-Bird let me go home for a night and come back on Friday to see if my CO2 level went up or down overnight. Thankfully, it had gone down a bit to 75- good because the BiPap helped it go down, but bad because it showed that overall, my CO2 was increased from the week prior.

So there was a big debate and I was allowed to go home for the weekend with a change to my BiPap settings, to make them stronger, and with my CysticMommy to pay diligent attention to me. I will repeat the test of my CO2 level next week.


In the meantime, my oldest friend, S-Artee, is here visiting! I am supposed to stay on BiPap "as much as I can." Oh no! S-Artee is my very best friend for 29 long years, and I haven't seen her in at least 5 years. She is here to spend wonderful time with me!! We were, you know, planning to TALK during her trip. One problem when you're on the bipap, is that it is hard to talk through the mask. It is possible, but you have to talk really loud inside the mask, to be heard at all outside the mask. This is one reason that I burnt my voice out so badly in the ICU. I did not realize that I was yelling inside of the mask every time I tried to talk to someone, to project my voice through the airtight plastic.

This brings us to the weekend's theme: Fun on the BiPap. One fun thing you can do on the BiPap that involves little talking, is joke-telling.

Exhibit A: WARNING: This video contains cackling.



Exhibit B: WARNING: This video contains me wearing the BiPap which increases the pudginess of my face:) I am not this pudgy-faced in real life. :)



YAY!! Tell a lame joke with your best friend today!!

Love, Cystic Gal!

PS. I also have uploaded another video to count for yesterday's post. See below!

Weekend Fun: Tips for Dance Parties

Hospital Haircut!

If you're in the hospital and feelin' sorta frumpy, try getting a haircut! I've been here for a month, and before that, I had only been out a few weeks! I feel like I've been here since August and my hair was suffering! Until today, I got a hairstylist from a shop in the hospital's neighborhood to come to my room and spruce up my 'do:

Word on the street is I might get out of the hospital tomorrow! YAY! I will start a pulmonary rehab program next week, and spend some much needed time at home with my cats and my Mom while wait to get the call to come back in for transplant surgery!! I hope it comes soon!

More soon,
CG

CysticGal and CysticLady: Twinsies of Evening Wear

I bet you all wonder what CysticGal and CysticLady
do with all their evening time . . .

Well, here it is! Glamorous!

CysticGal, toweley at the hospital.

CysticLady, toweley at home.

Goodnight! Spend your bloggy time tonight exploring other parts of the blog- perhaps the archive, or the labels section, or get on twitter. Everybody's doin' it!

Love, CG

The Placebo Effect or Mr. Miyagi: Good Enough for Me

Tonight I had some wonderful Reiki from a wonderful nurse I know and adore. I am also now sleepy and relaxed and rested. And so is my kittttty.

I will write about this better tomorrow, this crystal wearing hippy is sleepy.

Peace in, fear out.
Wax on, wax off.
Daniel-san, Cystic-gal.

:)

Goodnight, CG

In Defense of Alone Time

So right now I'm gettin so busy during day with the exercisin and the medicatin and the nappin and the eatin and the paper workin and the plannin and the bill payin and the phone callin and the emailin and the cats . . .

that I am not the bloggy that I used to be.

But I do have some good blog post titles building up in my and so here one is right here:

In Defense of Alone Time .

I am alone and awakey-wakey-no-mistakey . . . probably right now . . . about 10 hours of the 24 in a day.

Thus, an equation:
24 hours in a day
-9 hours sleepin at nighto
-3 hours at a doc appointment (travel incl)
-2 hours of visitor palsy walsies
---
10 hours of Cystic Gal Activity

Of this I spend time doing all that stuff up there, described as:

"the exercisin and the medicatin and the nappin and the eatin and the paper workin and the plannin and the bill payin and the phone callin and the emailin and the cats . . ."

Thus, a second, funnier equation:

10 hours awakey in a day
-1.5 hours exercising (cardio, yoga)
-2 hours medicatin (nebs, airway clearance, etc)
-2 hours nappin (if I'm good and get up)
-1.5 hours eatin (3-5 meals, yum)
-1 various tx related "get your papers in order" business
-1 neurotic worries over life/death
-1 phone calls I accept begrudgingly
-1 emailin' I accept lovingly
-all remaining time for cats.
---------------------------------
As you can see, cats aside, I have -1 hour to spend with myself.

No wonder I miss me so very very much.

Also, I offer you THIS ARTICLE in defense of my alone time and yours. The people here aren't even facing particular troubles and they get their alone time. Yay them!!

Don't you miss you?

A slice of life with CG and CL (CysticLady)

The People Want What They Want: Lighten Up Already!

When you're feeling blue. Down in the dumps. Cranky Face Magoo.
There is only one thing to do:

DANCE!

And if the first time doesn't work . . .

DANCE AGAIN!
NOTE: The second take is easily 1.5 million times funnier / more embarrassing
than the first for at least 5 reasons.

Read tomorrow to find out what the 5 reasons are!

Tomorrow, I promise to follow up on all posts of recent!
For tonight, Just dance,
Love, CG

Stream of Consciouness (Weekly Break From Overly Cerebral Posts...)

Quick updates. Today was certainly not as good of a day as yesterday. I was diggity dog tired most of the day. I slept a little later than I meant to (til 9), and ate a good breakfast, was sluggish through my morning meds and routine, and still felt poodidddly doo most of the day. Very very tired. Though I checked my O2 and heartrate and bp this morning, I was tooling around the house feeling very tired, and very clammy (many many hot flashes from the lupron at this particular week.) Around 2PM, yes, 2PM, I checked my oxygen, and though I was wearing 1.5L, my O2 was 83! Well no kidding I felt like poo. I was poo! So, I turned up the juice.

Having low oxygen creep up on you is such a menace. Like having bad blood sugar - you feel like crap just enough to know that you feel like crap, but that crappy feeling keeps you from having logical thoughts like "maybe I oughtta check my sugar," or "maybe my 02 is low?" Instead you lay around for a few hours wondering, vaguely, what might be wrong.

Also the POTpill didn't help. But I gained 3 lbs this week. No diggity. No doubt.

I blame this low 02 on my awesome workout yesterday. I must've made me some muscle mass :)

Tonight, I was happy to see that Jackie Warner's workouts are back on OnDemand for free :) !! I did the 1-on-1 core workout and it was awesome! During the workout I started to fantasize about Jackie coming to Boston to do rehab with me and turn me into a hot rockin new lung havin dancing diva. This resulting in the following tweet:

CysticGal@Jackiewarner10 i love your workouts. i have #cysticfibrosis and am preparing for transplant. i want you to come do rehab with me!less than 20 seconds ago from web in reply to Jackiewarner10

Then, I watched grey's anatomy with one of my besties, C-Daddy. He baked cookies, I ate two pudding cups, and then we watched the show while eating cookies, pudding cups and ice cream. The POTpill definetly helps with that calorie consumption! Grey's was pretty good but resulted in this tweet:

CysticGalon grey's tonight george o'malley died, donated lungs to patient with #cysticfibrosis. (fictional). Hard to watch with my pal, but good 2 c.

Poor C-Daddy and I both got all misty eyed and cried because well, there is a lot to to think about there.

Hmm. This post is not nearly so much stream o consciousness as I would like. It's more like stream o hello kitty diary.

Oh wells,
Goodnight, I'm gonna watch The Office and eat yet another pudding cup. I friggin love those pudding cups.

And don't you worry, DancingGal is coming!! I promise.
CG

Why I Write the Blog the Way I Write the Blog

STATCOUNTER REPORT THIS WEEK:

	Mon	Tues	Wed	Thur	Fri	Sat	Sun	Total	Avg
Pageloads	51	72	72	111	30	47	44	427	61
Unique Visitors	40	40	46	70	27	38	30	291	42
First Time Visitors	18	15	22	46	8	22	15	146	21
Returning Visitors	22	25	24	24	19	16	15	145	21

YAY READERSHIP! So many new of you this week!

AND- Congrats to the "Unleash Your Story"
Team Cystic Gal!
We were the NUMBER ONE EARNING TEAM THIS WEEK!

If you haven't donated to "Unleash Your Story" to help fight Cystic Fibrosis, you can do so by clicking HERE . Every dollar counts, so consider donating today!

Okay, today was a big day. I got a wonderful email that helped clarify my truest motivation in writing this daily blog and letting whatever comes out, come out:

<<
Hey there,

[...] Anyway, word on the bloggy street is that you're starting the transplant process? I'd love to chat with you about it, although I'm sure as the sister of a post-transplant CFer you could probably fill up multiple books with everything I still don't know about the whole thing. I'm definitely learning as I go here, which I guess is what all of us do with this disease, seeing as it never seems to strike the same way twice. I have to say, though, that I read your recent transplant post and found it beautifully powerful -- I empathize so much with your sense of things moving faster than expected (this time last year I was told I was "too healthy" for transplant and probably had another 2 years or so before I needed to be listed, now they're discussing listing me at multiple centers to move the process along), but more than that I just can't stop wondering how this CF fits in with the "rest" of me, which has always been and still is for the most part extremely active and, well, healthy? At any rate, whether I'm projecting or not, I loved what you wrote and how you wrote it. There's so much about this whole mess that is difficult to express and put into words -- it's fun to come across someone so eloquent and accessible about it all. [...]

Hope you're doing well aside from dealing with all this shit right now. And, by the way, I totally swear by Bare Minerals makeup too, which has to say something about great cystic minds thinking alike!

Take care,
[...]
>>

I write the blog because I think that I have something to say that other people want to say, but have trouble saying. I write the blog because I think best by writing. I don't know what I think about something, sometimes, unless I write about it. So why not share that writing?

Okay. AND today I kicked some serious aaaaasssss at exercise and walked 1.3 miles in 30 minutes at a max of 3.2mph. I was hoping sweating that much would decrease my hot flashes, but so far, it has not. I am like Delta Burke up in here.

I think that is all.

Today I got the idea to post a video of my dancing around my house, since that is one thing that I do to stay fit and be in a good mood. What do you think? To post or not to post? This could be my project for tomorrow.

Goodnight from your sweaty, tired CG.

Ten Beauty Secrets of Cystic Gal

Tonight in an attempt to keep it light here on CG, I will answer a question that I literally get all of the time, "How come you look so healthy?"

Now, of course I was blessed with natural beauty by my CysticMommy, and also schooled in a variety of beauty-upkeep-related funlings by CysticLady. So, they get a lot of credit here. I mean, genetics can't screw you every time. But here are ten beauty secrets I have long-utilized to keep my Cystic Sexy Ways.

1. Bare Minerals makeup. It is every bit as good as those infomercials. This makeup completely changes how I look. My friends do not believe me, they think I don't wear that much makeup. But if I don't wear this makeup for even one day, there is 100% guarantee that a co-worker, friend, family member or acquaintance will accuse me of feeling like shit. I have literally done a sales pitch for these Bare Minerals people at Sephora because I'm such a crazy believer. Try it.

2. Abs and Buns of Steel videos from the 80s. These videos are KEY to keeping strong ab and ass muscles despite your possible lack of muscle mass from CF. The videos are hilarious. The unitards are striped. The women are wearing pantyhose. Check into it.

3. Almay Under Eye Concealer Color WHITE. I put this concealer on very liberally under my eye, but also over my eyelid and in the corner of my eye. I blend it out and then apply makeup over it. It completely covers a multitude of sins.

4. General attention to my eyebrows, waxing and otherwise, not only because I've been told they are very animated, but to open up my eyes so I look so alive ;) Similarly, I curl my eyelashes.

5. Jackie Warner download workouts are completed whenever possible. Similar to those Buns of Steel videos above, Jackie's workout will get done what needs to get done without burning too many cardio calories outside of your cardio workout.

6. I used to tan. If I couldn't tan, I would wear bronzer on my cheeks and nose. This makes me look like I have "a little color." Little known fact: I have no color. Similarly, I always wear a pink-based lipstick. Even though I don't apply it a single time after I leave the house (my beauty upkeep ends at the bathroom door), this gives my lips a "health glow." Little known fact: I have no healthy glow.

7. Oil of Olay Cooling Eye Gel. It cools the bags that would be under my eyes if, say, I didn't use it.

8. Home Remedy Alert: I give myself a mask with a mix of lotion and coarse salt about once a week. I let the lotiony salty mix stay on my skin until it dries and then I rinse the salt off. I must've read this in a magazine when I was like 12. I've been doing it ever since and it helps dry out my face and exfoliate it so my face is as soft as a baby's butt. Little known fact: otherwise my face would be greasy and/or dry. This is particularly helpful when doing IVs that really mess with your face!!

9. I drink gatorade like I own the company. At a rehearsal, I'll drink an entire bottle of gatorade before we even warm up. I make sure to drink another bottle during rehearsal. Staying hydrating keep up the facade of my ever present energy.

10. The best secret a Cystic Gal can give another cystic gal: You are gorgeous no matter what and there is a 99% chance that none of these tips work whatsoever. Though I do really do all of them. And that's not just truthy. That's true!

Love, CG

My Underwear Drawer: A Fair Representation of Me

A little known fact about CG is that I came of age in a house run by a woman, my CysticMommy, who worked for a lingerie company. I was the only seventh grader to wear a hot pink bra and thus began a life of altogether too much attention to underwear. CysticLady shares this passion handed down by CysticMommy, and writes, I like underwear, to me, as I sit here typing.

I have come to understand that my current state of being can be easily assessed by looking into my underwear drawer. All a mess? Thus, I am a mess. Empty? Thus, I am empty. All neat and colorful? Ah. Thus and thus and thus.

Tonight, in an attempt to put order to the chaos around me, I decided to spend time doing one of my very favorite CG things to do: organize and categorize, prioritize and synchronize my underwear.

Thus. I have learned:

A few weeks ago, I was the ball of white in the back of the drawer.

Now, I am all the way to the right. Basic. Functioning. Solid.

Soon, I will back in the middle. Colorful. Content. Expressive.

After that, further left.
Comfortable. Beautiful. Understated.

And then, well, I'll really be back.

There are a few other messages in the image but I"ll leave that to your own discretion.



So I ask, CG Readers:
What does your underwear drawer say about YOU?

PS. Tonight's post is double-whammy. I finally decided to upload a video that I had delayed, below. Watch it if you so desire. Goodnight from Cinderella-CG. It is Midnight! POOF!

This is an old video

About a week ago (Wow, it seems longer ago than that!), I made this video. When I looked at on the very small screen of my digital camera, I was pretty happy with it. I looked okay, and sounded okay, and though the image was dark, I figured, it was good enough and informational.

Then I downloaded it onto my laptop and watched it again and was really quite astonished to watch myself in nearly life-like-size, and to see and hear how out of breath I sounded even though I was wearing my O2 and sitting.

I wondered, "How long have I sounded this way?" In my work, I have the opportunity to hear my recorded voice fairly regularly, and I tend to have a good ear for how my projected voice sounds while I am working in rehearsal or on a mic. (I admittedly have no attention to how my voice sounds when I am not working which is one of the many reasons I have so many vocal problems . . . ) anyway . . .

The long and short of it is that I didn't end up posting the video because I did not like seeing the muscles in my neck and chest heave, seeing my shoulders rolled in, and seeing my gulp air in between words. And I wondered - how did I come to sound this bad so quickly, and how did I NOT notice?

It's only been a week since I shot it. I don't know if I'm still doing this.

But I know that one day I won't have to do it, anymore.



PS/Disclaimer: Even though I'm out of breath here, yoga really IS good for you and your lungs and my living this many years with an FEV1 of 46% or less (Currently 23%) is only proof of that. So, DO do yoga.