Okay I made it through one bad day. One bad bad bad bad day.
Today, it was the sort of day where CG feels hopeless about her health and her personal and professional life in one big ball of sad sad sad, bad bad bad day.
The good side of today: I made it through the day without sending angry sad sad bad bad emails to my ex boyfriend across town, or the two friends I have lost in the last six months. Similarly, I did not make any rash family phone calls. I managed to delete the few snide comments on made on Facebook. I DID manage to take all my meds and do that whole regime, complete with a PORT needle change, with only one small anxiety type of situation about the needle's length. Also, I talked to the three people that I can talk to when I am in this slightly incoherent state of hopelessness and nose-blowing. Three. That's a lot.
The bad side of today: I slept most of the day. When I wasn't awake and crying, I was asleep. That can't be good. And I accomplished nothing nothing nothing that wasn't on my "health" list of to-do's. Also, the bad side to today was that I had today at all.
Tomorrow will have to be better. Because it won't be today. So that's good.